I managed to finish the Wind-up Bird Chronicles by Haruki Murakami and I'm reasonably happy with the ending. I mean I suppose that part of the Japanese state of mind and philosophy or tradition is not to explain to the audience absolutely every detail of the story and to leave some of it up to their interpretation. Or at least to make the reader think/understand some of it by themselves. So in that sense I didn't expect everything to be crystal clear, but I think I got it over all. Just don't ask me to explain it. Or I guess I could try to articulate it - but if you haven't read the book yourself, it doesn't make sense to read an interpretation of it.

One funny thing about it - I have been picturing Dr. Lee from Three Rivers in the role of Toru, and since then I got a weird feeling watching the show. It's like I have a secret relationship with Dr Lee now - and once in a while I'm wondering what Toru is doing in that hospital. It will pass. Btw, he's hot - you should check him out.

Talking about the wind-up bird, I was thinking that we go through our lives like some wind-up toys too, and that our spring has a given energy to begin with, which winds down little by little as we grow old. Many things and people can wind us up again from time to time. I was just wondering how do you know where your spring is at in terms of winding down, and how that doesn't necessarily go with the physical degradation of your body - there are old people who are very sprite and younger people who are sort of tired all the time and blase.

Anyway, it was a good book all things considered and I'm glad it was pushed on to me. Not really pushed, but if you leave a book in my house, sooner or later it's gonna get read.

I don't often repost clips but this one is really well made - for cat lovers:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/awesomer/what-cats-are-really-thinking-cci

In other news, I am learning about 5 new libraries/APIs for writing games this semester, which is sort of awesome, but can get confusing. I have been writing this iPod touch game using the Game Salad, a pretty nice program overall but with some limitations. I'm still learning my way around Flash and plan to do a memory game to hone my skills. And turn it into a lab for my game programming class. It looks like the students would really like to learn a bit about the XNA - so I will be installing that on Windows soon-ish and start playing with. And last, I just installed the full iPod/iPhone SDK on my office Mac because I think that if you're serious about writing iPod games, you need more than the Game Salad. I will start looking into it some more any time now.

I am reading this book that Chrys left for me last summer, The Chronicles of the Wind-Up Bird by Haruki Murakami and it's sort of different from my usual lectures. The book feels very strange, although nothing really that abnormal (or paranormal) has happened yet per se. When I started I had a suspicion that the lead character was in fact dead, kind of like in the Sixth Sense style, but I don't think that's the case. Although I'm not completely convinced yet either. It has a little bit of the Ring feeling, the original Japanese movie. Just a type of voice that I'm not used to that given me a feeling that anything can happen at any time.

I also find it funny how people in books and movie tell their life stories with intimate details to complete strangers within 10 minutes of meeting them, just because the author needs to tell that to the reader, or because the detective needs to learn a clue about the murder, and so on. How many times did that happen to anyone real? Not that I'm complaining about it in this book, it's just funny when you think about it.

I haven't posted here in a while, it's true. This one is about a trip to Toronto to see a play of Matthew Ferguson, Vigil. He produced it himself with a new company he started out, Long Eared Plays. The play was about a guy who is asked to come visit by a dying aunt to say goodbye and he ends up staying a lot longer than planned because the aunt isn't really dying that fast. It was really funny, like almost every line was amusing. Matthew was excellent in it and it was great to be able to enjoy his acting up close (very close).

( More details )

As a footnote to this adventure, I discovered in the meantime that Malcolm Gets, the one who played the quirky but charming Richard in Caroline in the City, another actor I happen to like, will be playing the same role in NY soon. I wish I could go. I'll have to figure out if I can, by any chance.

Lots of things happening around me. Not directly involving me, but I feel close enough to everyone that it affects me. I'm good for now, but it's not the right time for anyone to be snapping at me. Especially for no reason. I feel like the more I try to fix everything around me, the worse it gets.

I've been obsessing these days over Empires. Actually it's We Are Empires (because the name was taken). I'm going to see them next Friday in Chicago and right now that's the thing I'm most looking forward to. I will just be there for the music, and ignoring some people I might know who will probably be there. Not because I don't want to talk to them, but because I don't think they need my company. There is just one person I could tolerate at this concert, but I can't ask them to come. And I'm not even sure if this is their kind of music. Basically I'm playing anti-social right now. To some extent.

I am relieved to find out that 30 Seconds to Mars is reaching a settlement with EMI Records. 30 millions (one million for every second I guess) is a lot to gamble in a guy versus big corporation game, even with a chance to win. So a new album and maybe concerts should be on their way now. Yay. At least someone is seeing reason (unlike other people I know).

Lately I've been feeling like a noble at the court of the Tudors or of one of the Louis French kings, but without all the sex. It all sounds so glamorous. It ain't. I'll have to take things in my hands soon and try to get the machine running smoothly again, but I'm concerned that I might be clumsy and break more stuff than what I would like to fix. It doesn't look so far like I've done anyone any good trying to mingle. I might learn to keep my mouth shut from all this, after all.

Anyway, I gots a neural network and data to feed it, and I'll get more data soon and that is good. Now the real hard stuff starts, which is making it do what I want. But it's fun and it feels good to make progress.

I've been to New Orleans this last week. Taken off in the morning, drove all day, spent two days in good company and being warm and walking a lot and seeing lots of things, including a panel that gave me ideas for a course. Everyone else (almost) was there for a conference. I felt like a fraud being there just for fun. Then drove back to Chicago for an amazing concert at the Bottom Lounge. And I'm posting the link here because We Are Empires will be coming back in May and I intend to go if I don't have something else to do that very day.

Evan Taubenfeld was the first act and I enjoyed it, mostly because he must be the funniest emo guy in Chicago, with a cute and touching style. It was hard not to smile/laugh and he knows very well how to engage a public who was there for someone else. Apparently he was featured in an Avril Lavigne clip once, if I got that right. Next was Empires, acoustic, and even though I'm quite familiar with the music, it's the first time I saw them. A really good first impression. The singer's voice sounds just as good live, with a disturbing but appealing quality, and he can do interesting stuff with it. It's a group to keep an eye on.

And last, there was Bill Beckett from The Academy Is... The poster had the name of the group, but it was just him. Sisky was supposed to be there but he got injured saving a girl from a dragon. I suppose a big model of some sort that was falling on the girl and his hand got in the way. On purpose. Bill didn't tell us the whole story. Back to Bill. I was impressed with his guitar skills. I mean the man can play (insert here a slightly modified chorus from Ziggy). The songs sounded great with just him and an acoustic guitar (actually two of them that he kept switching, for some reason), and we got to hear a lot of little stories about them. I didn't know, for example, what His Girl Friday was about (go Bill, that's a cute one). I also gotta give him props for his Rubik solving skills (see a recent clip on his blog above). He's my hero. Also an acoustic show meant that he didn't get to run around the stage and do his usual rock star routines, but he talked a lot more instead. I will take that for a change. Right in front of me there was this old guy with a little hat who didn't seem to be watching over anyone else (I thought he must be some girl's dad), but seemed to really enjoy the show and the music instead. I wanted to give him a hug. Then I wondered if it could have been Bill's dad by any chance, given that this was his home town.

Down to earth from there (or Earth 2, according to BSG). It's been a rough two months for everyone, it seems. I don't know why that is. Maybe the world has used up their good karma when Obama was elected and now we're paying for it (most likely not - but I do believe in a sort of universal balance and that if something really good happens to you, something really bad has to happen to cancel things out or not necessarily in that order - it can't rain or shine all the time for anyone). I know that people would like me to be well. ( Cutting the details as not interesting but it's my blog and I'll rant if I want to )

I've been reading The Salmon of Doubt by Douglas Adams. At first I was disappointed to find out it wasn't fiction, but a collection of essays. But now I'm glad I picked it up. Everyone should read the cookies story. It's absolutely hilarious.

One of them sent me back to the parallel universe issues and reminded me of Neal Stephenson's book that I read recently. And it made me remember a question that I have: say, in all these alternative worlds just a little bit different from ours, there's a version of me, right? I mean in many of them. But it's not me. It can't be someone else either that looks like me. What if these parallel world simply exist, none of them more real than any other, and then our conscience/soul chooses a path in this multi-dimensional universe. So those copies of me are only probabilistic echoes and not beings with soul. Then I wonder, how do I know that everyone else's soul travels through the universe on the same alternative path as myself? What if we only cross paths from time to time? How many souls do really reside in this world and how many of the people I meet are only probabilistic echoes of beings from a different universe? Because if the multiverse exists, and it most likely does, there is no reason for my path through it to be the same as anyone else's. And of course, this is just speculation because I like to let my mind wander.

Coming back to American Idol, I am sorry for anyone in the competition who is not Adam, because they are a whole league behind him. He's got it all: looks, voice, energy. I just hope America knows what they're doing with the votes (guys, you got it right recently, don't screw up now, please).

Otherwise I'm sick again and totally miserable. ( Cut for whining. )

I can't believe I didn't notice before that I had the Fuse channel, in HD even. And MTV hits and VH1 classic. And Paladia apparently. It's decided: for the rest of my life I'm gonna just stay home and watch music on tv. And talking about it, I love this Dido song and it kind of reflects how I feel atm. Not that it makes any difference to anyone.

I'm thinking of taking a trip to NY in early April. I was kind of looking for an excuse to get out of town for a little while. It would be to see a musician I like, and there are other things I could be doing while there. Maybe even visit with an in-law. We can probably both use the company.

I've started to watch American Idol again last week. I like to wait until they are done with the first steps of the selection. That's when they are left with the best singers. I already have my clear favorite: the emo guy, with a Pete Wenz look and a voice that can hold a candle to Amy Lee of Evanescence. But I'm afraid he's too much into his style to go all the way through: he managed to make a country song sound like Marylin Manson (Randy said NIN - could also be).

Oh, I also finished a painting I've had in mind for a while, and it can be seen here.

I watched the Oscars yesterday. I was rooting for Kate Winslet for the lead female, not because I thought that role was good - I haven't seen the movie, the subject didn't appeal to me - but she's an amazing actress who should have won one already. Like everyone says. No surprise on the Heath Ledger best supporting, just a question: of the two women who came on stage, which one was the mom and which one the sister? I couldn't tell. Props to the mom for that.

I didn't expect Slumdog Millionaire to win so many of them, though. I've seen the movie, by myself, even though someone told me they wanted to see it, and I said I was interested. They never came up with a precise plan and I wasn't in the mood for waiting for anyone to make up their mind. Anyway, I think people should go see it. I know it's superhyped, but it's good. It's as simple as that.

I hate Jason Mraz. ( Cut for more silliness. )

For anyone who is curious to hear Liana and me sing, here's a clip I just added to youtube:

It's a traditional Romanian song with lyrics by Eminescu, about someone talking to a forest. I used GarageBand for the composition.

I finally finished the book Anathem. A few more impressions before I put it on the shelf. The thing about the dialog that I mentioned before, it turns out it was a good point and there was a reason for it. The way Neil Stephenson describes it, there is a directed graph of worlds, each one that has a connection to another one being closer to the perfect theoretical world (that of mathematical objects, like circles, or god, or a combination). The information circulates between these worlds down the connections (from more perfect world to less perfect ones). Events in one world reflect down the "Wick" (as this graph is called). There is a question that is asked and not answered in the book, why human beings from different parallel worlds are so similar - and the answer, based on the logic of all this, is that they are all reflections of a being that exist in that perfect world which is at the top of the Wick and from which the information descends into all the others. Which being would qualify as god, in fact. Except that nobody takes that logical step in the book.

It's also a funny explanation for Heaven and Hell, but not one that is given in the book. Well, a souls that would move "up" in the Wick, would go to a world closer to the perfect theoretical world, and thus better in many ways. A soul moving down in the Wick would indeed go to a world that is worse in many aspects. For example, where the Cold War actually results in a nuclear war. So Heaven would be what you get to if you move up as much as possible, while Hell is the convergence if you go down. But the question is also, are these two extreme world real, or can you just move up and down an infinite number of times without reaching the theoretical worlds, only getting asymptotically closer. But this is just my speculation on the ideas in the book.

In conclusion, I liked it a lot, I thought it was very smart. It was funny how usually when you get to the last quarter of a book, it usually goes fast because event sort of tumble towards the resolution, but with this one I still had to take my time because you really have to focus to get what's going on. Well, some of the details at least. The big lines are sort of clear.

Talking about Neils, I was happy to see that Gaiman got the Newbury award, and the Colbert bump for the Graveyard Book.

More on this book. I find the idea of Dialog interesting, in general and in this book. Some of the real life dialogs are either narratives (look what happened today), or exchange of information, which means that one of the parties in the dialog doesn't have an opinion on the subject to begin with, or planning, or just content-less small talk. All of these work fine. But there is one particular form of dialog where the two or more people don't agree on a subject. My experience is that this rarely leads to anybody changing their opinions. It often is a matter of bullying - who can throw arguments at the other one faster, and make them sound more clever, all the while trying to make it look as if the merits of said arguments matter, when in fact they don't. It's almost always a subjective thing, whether one agrees with an idea or not. Take the presidential debates, for example. Candidates have different opinions about one thing or another, neither of them concedes a point to the other very often, and most people who watch them don't go out with their opinions changed. I see these dialogs in general as rather pointless. Of course, I'm exaggerating too.

Well, in Anathem they really do have these dialogs on opposing ideas, and they are as logical as humans can make them, and there is usually a winner and both parties agree who it is. Just as in a boxing match you'd know who won and the loser would concede it as obvious. It's the obvious part that amazes me.

Another detail I like about it. The world is completely strange, different from any other fantasy book I've read, mostly in the organization of the society, although of course there are common elements with lots of familiar things. But the way it is presented, it's like starting from scratch with all the rules we take for granted (in a story involving elves, dwarfs and humans, you don't really need the rules thoroughly explained, for example). Usually after reading many books you have a good number of archetypes of characters in your mind of which you are more or less conscious, and while you read you associate the characters with one or another and that makes the expectations you have of this character easier to put in place. In Anathem this doesn't happen. There is not enough common background for archetypes to be easily pasted on anybody. It comes down to it after a while, but you need to read quite a lot about anybody to figure out who and what they are. It's probably more challenging than other books for this reason.

I think I've mentioned here before an idea that I had that our brain basically can communicate sometimes with their counterparts in parallel universes through the quantic interferences. I had not read much about either by that point. In the meantime it seems that the idea that particles from our universe can interact with particles from parallel universes is more common than I thought. I'm not sure if it's accepted as one of those theories that have not been proved yet but that are very likely to be true (like string theory), or if it's seen as speculation.

The point it, I've found this exact theory taken further in the book I'm reading right now, Anathem by Neil Stephenson. In this book one character comes up with a theory that our brain use the quantic interferences with parallel universes to do computations all the time and for anything of some complexity. In one sense, it might as well be true, because some of the things our brain can compute are very hard to devise algorithms for.When I read that I was like "but of course". At the point where I am in the book, it is suggested that a whole concent (kind of like a monastery for mathematicians) has been making experiments with it.

The only difference with my theory is that in mine, the parallel universes might be out of phase with our in time, so you perceive things that might happen in the future.

Beside that the book is fantastic. I love it. The idea is a religious-like organization based on science, mostly mathematics with some physics and philosophy. There are many references to some mathematical theory or another which makes it nicer to a scientific, though probably pretty much anyone can read it. But they wouldn't find it as exciting. For example, they have the Traveling Salesman problem in there somewhere, but they call it the "lazy peregrin". I can see why I received it as a Xmas present.

Apparently I'm a bit anemic right now and I have to take iron. This is weird because I don't feel weak and I don't look like it either. But anyway.

I've started to read Anathem by Neil Stephenson. So far it makes me think of Oblivion, the RPG. It's funny to imagine books that you read as taking place in games you play, even though the other way around is more common. I had a similar feeling with the first volume of the Princess Meredith series by Laurel K. Hamilton and Dark Age of Camelot, and then the Salvatore Drizzt series and World of Warcraft. Having some creatures in common is one thing, but there's more than that. I wonder which book could make me think of LOTRO... no, wait, I know that one.

3 movies were waiting for me as I got back home. I was hoping at least one of them would make me feel good, but they were all heavy dramas (how do I choose these movies again and why?). The best one was Bad Education, by Almodovar. With Gael Garcia Bernal as a very attractive transvestite. Maybe not the strongest Almodovar movie out there, but still worth seeing.

I'm in a fixing mood this week. That's what happens when I have enough time to relax for a while. My thing right now is, "if it doesn't work, fix it". Well, and I always end up finding out that there are thing you simply can't fix and give up. After a while.

Something annoying happened while I was away: I got a virus on my laptop. I was just innocently browsing something on deviantArt (so beware whoever uses that site) when things went crazy, and they are still crazy. The virus is contained but some stuff doesn't work anymore. It looks like the only way I can get it back to normal is to reinstall everything (yay, what a drag), and the problem with that is that they didn't give me a system CD, it came as a separate partition, and I've installed a Linux thingie on top of the usual install - didn't wipe out anything, but things might be harder to find now. All sorts of issues. I've seriously considered erasing everything and going with an Ubuntu only system. If I could play all my games on it, I would. It's amazing how you have your anti-virus up to date and it catches the virus, but damage is still done. I mean, why do I bother with it in the first place?

On a different note, I didn't think that being called "woman" could be so funny. Especially in a sentence starting with "seriously". Serious, me? You gotta be kidding.

To be sung to the army marching song.

Walking in the park today
Mosquito bit my arm away
If I fall upon my back
Please just leave me in the track
These mosquitoes suck your blood
Then they drag you through the mud
Got my blisters during the week
No more red bumps do I seek
Don't despair we will fight back
Kill mosquito with a smack

This is a collective poem with 4 authors.

I watched 4 months, 3 weeks, and 2 days last night. Another Romanian depressing movie and I was glad that I didn't watch it alone, this time. Way better than the Nervous System though. I expected it to be tough, I just didn't think it would be so literal. It took me back twenty years ago on several levels and some of the memories were bitter-sweet. Like the guy doing the black market thing in the dorms. Or the army uniform on one of the girls, complete with the little cap. I can see why it won the Palme D'Or at Cannes last year, though. Everyone acted very well, so well that it didn't feel like acting at all. Yes, that's how people are over there, some of them. I suspect that the party scene was from Mungiu's own memories, what with his parents being doctors and probably many of their friends too. People who are best friends but still call each other "Doctor Such and Such". Kind of a medieval mentality in a way. Ok, so my cultural and ethnic deed of the week is done. I can now watch The Day The Earth Stood Still in good conscience.

I also finished Joe Hill's 20th Century Ghosts yesterday, to my regret. I like this author a lot. This is a collection of short horror-ish stories and I love the way he draws you into the plot almost from the first paragraph, how he keeps you interested even through parts that seem common place, and how often you realize about half way through that this is a completely different story than what you were thinking. Or what you expected. His writing style also works well for me, not too cynical, not too sweet. I think there is still one novel by him out there that I haven't read yet and it's going on my list of things to do.

I had a dream last night about a research subject. When I woke up this morning I realized that it's something I might like to do indeed. Then another idea spun off from it, and that's something that I will be working on for real. Something that I've been thinking of a while back but never got around to it because it wasn't clear in my mind how it would go. It's good to get inspiration just a couple of weeks short of your sabbatical starting.

I've been spending quite a lot of time in Moria lately, and in spite of dying a lot more than I would like, I still can't wait to get back. It's a tricky thing, the zone. Normally when you have a map and you need to go from A to B, you decide on a path on the map and then take it. Not here. Some of the areas might be just mazes, and the map helps in those cases, but others have several layers and there are many places where you can fall to your death, and a path that looks like a path on the map might not be connected at all. It takes a while to learn your way around. They did a good job of giving the players a feeling of being lost in there, just like the fellowship was.

I finally got around to seeing Sistemul Nervos (the nervous system) by Mircea Danieliuc and the OMG is the best way to describe how I feel. It's so depressing. It actually made my tummy ache, seeing all these people with hernias. All along I wanted to ask, is that supposed to be grandma? The movie was made indeed after a story written by her. I think the director spent some time talking to her because the imitation was pretty good. I recognized some of the gestures and expressions, even the woman who plays her looks like her. The second part was a bit more surreal, the riot and everything, and less credible, but it went well with the evolution of her state of mind. It ended with a few reflections that were well thought though terribly sad - the kind of thing that rings true and for which you don't really have a good answer. It made me feel terrible about everything: poor people, old people, women, men, retired people, pretty much everyone in the movie is completely pathetic. Except for Paul, of course. I liked the dual nature of his appearances in her dreams, it was well done.

Now I feel kind of sick (and it doesn't help that I really am sick) and I may wash this movie out of my mind with Princess Bride. Or a few hours of LOTRO. I also need to remember that my real grandma is prettier, healthier, with a good fashion sense, who takes good care of herself, is full of energy, and the last I heard she had a boyfriend. So there, Mr. Danieliuc.